A Woman, A Wife

I have been married my WHOLE life! I married Shane at 18 years old and next month we will celebrate our 17th wedding anniversary. I have married many years longer than alot of the women I work with. Marriage has been, well, hard. I find it interesting that the definition of marriage is "the state of being united" and the definition of united is "made one."

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I don't know about you but I get real disgusted with myself sometimes and I get even more disgusted with Shane. We are most definitely "made one." After being with this man since I was 16 years old and then being married to him for nearly 17 years I feel quite comfortable telling him when I think he is wrong, when he has made me mad or just have a general conversation of my thoughts and feelings with him. I don't hold anything back with him and that filter in my mind that says "don't say that" is turned off when I'm around him. Good or bad that is how it is and for some people that might not work but for us it seems to. Well, it might not work but I think he and I are made of silly puddy because we just tend to let it roll off our backs and move on. Because, at the end of it all, we both know that the other one is in this marriage for the right reasons and words are just that, words.

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So, with that being said, how many of you can relate to whiskers in the bathroom sink? Underwear left laying on the floor right where they dropped it? Mud on the carpet at the front door where they stopped to take their shoes off so they wouldn't track mud through the whole house but it never crossed their minds to come in through the kitchen door where there is vinyl flooring? Or, I'm sure none of you can relate to the sound of "Baby, I forgot to get a towel before I got in the shower!" I have said many, many, many times to Shane, "You are 36 years old. You have been taking baths by yourself for the better part of 30 years now and you still forget that you need a towel?!?!?!?!" At this he simply rolls his eyes and grins. He does it out of meanness not forgetfulness. Some days I think he leaves the underwear in the floor, the mud tracked in the carpet and the whiskers in the sink just to hear me fuss. That way he always knows where I am! (heehee)

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My Momma use to always say that pretty is as pretty does. It has taken me years to understand that but she was so right. My Mother has always been a little short thing. She has never been one to wear expensive clothes or worry about what was in style. She takes pride in her looks but she never obsesses over it. She isn't the grandmother that walks around looking as though she has been preserved for future generations. She is simply NaNa. She is the most beautiful wife and mother that I could ever imagine. She is a God fearing woman, a holy woman. Her inner disposition is exactly what is described in 1 Peter 3:1-4. "...Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition."

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Oh how I need this word today! Indifferent as husbands are we are to be holy women! Yes, it is nice to make sure our hair is in place, our eyebrows are plucked to perfection and our nails are nothing more than fabulous but, are we holy? I sit here today so convicted because I spend many days, and I mean many days, frustrated with myself as a woman. My hair isn't as luxurious as I wish it were. I'm a little (well alot) on the robust side. I am never neatly put together like some women are. But right here in 1 Peter is tells me, not reminds me, tells me that my outer appearance does not matter but my inner disposition...my heart, my holiness is what matters. It matters to my husband. It matters to my children. And, it matters to others around me. But, most of all, it matters to God! Being a woman does not consist of our outer beauty, being a woman is more than that. It is about being holy!